Grounded in Grace--May 9, 2022

Grounded in Grace--May 9, 2022

"I thank God that I baptized none of you except Crispus and Gaius, so that no one can say that you were baptized in my name. (I did baptize also the household of Stephanas; beyond that, I do not know whether I baptized anyone else.) [1 Corinthians 1:14-16]

There is a crucial difference between knowing something is important enough that it needs to be done, on the one hand, versus needing to be the one to do it yourself because of your own ego.  In fact, sometimes there are things that are so important to a lot of people that you know it's best for you NOT to be the one to do them.  

That's rather counter-intuitive, I'll grant.  A lot of us were raised on the notion that if a think is worth doing, it's worth doing well... and sometimes, we tell ourselves, the only way to make sure it's done "right" is for us to do it ourselves.  We don't mean it to be an ego-trip.  We aren't trying to suggest that nobody else can do things adequately... but yeah, sometimes it does come across that way.  Sometimes we persuade ourselves that Carly Simon was singing, "Nobody Does It Better" about us, when maybe really we're a little more in line for "You're So Vain."  And it can be hard in those times, not only to see that truth about ourselves, but then also to let go of control of whatever it is we think is so important that we have to be the ones to do it.

And to be honest here, that's not only a trait I'll confess that I wrestle with sometimes, but it's also one that the apostle Paul had to work on, too.  I know we church folks can have a habit of putting biblical figures on a pedestal or pretending they didn't have their own insecurities of foibles, but it seems pretty clear from his own writings that sometimes Paul really wanted to be the "I'll-do-it-myself-to-make-sure-it's-done-right" guy... and he also had to learn when to let go and put things in someone else's hands, only to discover that the universe didn't fall apart when someone else was in charge other than Paul. So if we've struggled with that letting go, at least we can take some comfort in knowing we're in decent company on that count.

Maybe the real learning is that some things are so important that we need to be able to get out of the way to let it happen without our personal baggage getting in the way.  Much like a wise judge will know to recuse him or herself when a case could present a conflict of interest, there are times when we need to step back, not because something isn't worth our time or attention, but exactly because it is so important that we need to remove our own personal "stuff" from the equation.  If you are a judge who truly cares about justice and transparency, you know it's better sometimes to remove any possible hint of impropriety by stepping back from hearing a case because you don't want to taint the outcome or give the impression of bias.  And so, similarly here, Paul himself looks back on his time in Corinth with a sense of relief that he didn't baptize many people and thereby add fuel to the fire of their dividing themselves along the lines who baptized them, who first preached to them, or who was their favorite pastor.  It's not that baptizing people is unimportant, much less bad.  It's the opposite:  because baptizing people is SO important, and because the unity that comes from sharing our common baptismal identity as God's beloved is SO important as well, Paul is grateful he didn't do anything that could have inadvertently contributed to divisions and factions there. 

Like I say, it is strange to imaging caring about something or someone SO much that you know you SHOULDN'T be the one to do it yourself.  But I think that's where Paul is.  He cares less about getting to be the center of attention, or getting the photo op, or being seen as important or spiritual or whatever, than he cares about the health of the community to whom he is writing.  He doesn't need to cast himself as the hero, or the "soul-winner," or the head pastor, because he knows the beloved community itself is more important than his title or status.  He also knows that it's more truthful to ensure that God gets the glory rather than Paul himself for whatever good he has done.  So Paul tries to extricate himself from any possible way of being seen as the real focus of attention over Jesus.  He wants to make sure that his ministry is centered on Christ rather than Paul himself being in the limelight.  And it really is a beautiful thing to think that Paul could be so secure in God's love for him, and so clear about his place in God's work, that he didn't need to make himself the hero or the savior by insisting on officiating at every baptism there in Corinth.  It really is a blessing to be so grounded in grace that you don't have to do it all in order to seem super-spiritual.  And it is a mark of a wise soul when you care more about the well-being of the community than you do about getting credit or time in the spotlight.

That's what we are invited to as well--to be people honest enough to know we aren't the center of the Christian faith... because Jesus is.  And from that place, we are free... we are honest... and we are courageous.  May these things be true of us today.

Lord Jesus, give us the grace to get out of the way of your work in the world, as well as to know we are yours already.