Becoming (Or, Watching the Paint Dry)--June 20, 2022

Becoming (Or, Watching the Paint Dry)--June 20, 2022

"Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart.  Then each one will receive commendation from God." [1 Corinthians 4:5]

I was painting the walls of our upstairs bathroom over the weekend--you know, one of those chores that had been on the to-do list all spring, waiting for a free enough window of time.  And the new color was one we had never used anywhere else in the house, a shade of sea green that I believe they call rather evocatively "Tidewater."  It had been a while since we had first picked out paint samples once upon a time, and I tend to be an only-eight-colors-in-the-crayon-box kind of guy when it comes to picking colors for painting walls, so I really didn't know what to expect this stuff to look like.

So as I'm rolling this stuff on the walls, there came a moment when I paused in fear and panic--some of the walls had darker patches on them, and some were still really light.  I was worrying about whether one shade or the other was the "right" one, and then I was worried that I hadn't properly stirred the paint before pouring into my tray, or that something had gone wrong at our local Sherwin-Williams when we ordered it, or... something.  And just before I went into full panic mode wondering if my walls were going to be permanently splotched or would have to be painted over all over again, I remembered: sometimes paint dries funny, and the color the paint appears to be when it's wet isn't the shade it turns out to be when it's dry.  Whew.  Cue deep breaths, followed by a sigh of relief.  I just needed to remember that I wasn't seeing the final product yet, and it was not going to be helpful to judge the appearance of the walls fifteen minutes into the project.  In time, it would all even out, and it would be the right shade we had chosen--but I would need to be patient, and not try to make a judgment while the painting was still in process.

In fact, if I did stop partway through to go and re-paint a spot that was turning darker to try and make it match the other, wetter spots on the wall, I would find that those other areas were starting to dry and darken, too, and I could have been at it forever, never getting everything all the same shade until I had gone through all my paint!  No, the right thing to do at that moment was just to keep on keeping on--to keep doing the best work I knew how to do, and to trust that in the end, it would become clear that the color was true and my work was decent.

In moments like that, though, sometimes it is hard not to stop midway and second-guess yourself, or to look for flaws that might not actually be flaws, or to get fussy that nothing looks like it's in its final form.  It's hard to remember that alongside the labor is waiting... and allowing things to become.  And it is surprisingly tempting to bring the actual progress to a halt and to waste your time literally watching paint dry.

And while the apostle Paul had probably never had to paint a bathroom "Tidewater" green, he does see our work as God's people in much the same way.  It is a tempting, but wrong-headed, move to start judging work while the work is still in progress.  It's tempting to see the dark splotches on the wall and think that something has gone wrong, or that someone has failed, when maybe it's actually a sign that everything is progressing precisely as it should.  It's easy to judge our own work, or others' work, and to decide that something has gone wrong, or somebody has failed, when maybe things are still becoming what they are meant to be. Sometimes we had one idea in mind of how something was supposed to go--a project, a conversation, an opportunity to do good or share your faith, maybe--and it doesn't go in the direct you had expected.  Rather than assuming it's all for naught, maybe it's worth continuing on in doing good work as well as you know how to do it, and to trust that God is able to work both through and beyond our efforts.  Sometimes our efforts take a little additional time to come to fruition.  Sometimes we were expecting one outcome while God's Spirit is working out something different from our labors.  Sometimes we are looking for results you can measure in numbers--more people, more money, more social media "likes"--and God is interested in something deeper than those kinds of things.  Like the old saying goes, if you want crabgrass, you only need to wait a day or two--but if you want an oak tree, you're going to have to give it a few more decades.  

So here's a reminder to all of us: where you are doing good but still can't be sure what the outcome of all your striving is, keep at it.  Don't stop to judge whether the paint is all drying identically; just give it time.  And where you are quick to judge others' work for God's Reign, give it some time as well.  Give others the same grace God is giving your work to simply let things... become.

Lord God, give us the grace to be patient--both with our own efforts and the work of others--so that we can come to see how you bring forth good things from our efforts.