Unpretentious Sheep--December 7, 2023

Unpretentious Sheep--December 7, 2023

"Let your hand be upon the one at your right hand,
  the one you have made so strong for yourself. 
 And so will we never turn away from you;
  give us life, that we may call upon your name.
 Restore us, O Lord God of hosts;
  let your face shine upon us, and we shall be saved." [Psalm 80:17-19]

I had to stop and read these words from this past Sunday a second time to make sure I understood them rightly. That phrase, "And so we will never turn away from you," has been sticking out to me, and I've been turning it over and over in my mind. And the more I re-read these verses from what we call Psalm 80, the more I am convinced that this isn't a promise: it's a prayer.  That is to say, the poet here isn't bragging, "Speaking for all of your people, God, I know we will never turn away from you. Our faith is so strong, and our commitment is unflagging!"  Rather, it's part of a request, a plea, to God:  "Let your hand be on us, so that we will not turn away from you anymore."  It's a cry for help to God admitting our fickleness, not a boast about how faithful and committed we are. 

That's a hard shift for a lot of us to make in our thinking.  We are often more inclined to think that faith is about presenting our best selves to God and showing off how committed we are, how great our contributions to God's Kingdom are, and how virtuous we aspire to be.  And instead, maybe a more honest perspective sounds more like, "I need your help to enable me be faithful.  I want to be the kind of person who doesn't turn away from you, God--but I can't do that on my own.  Help me to be the person I want to be!"  That's hard, because some part of us is always wrestling with doubts over whether we are acceptable enough to God or not.  Some part of us thinks we have to keep proving our worthiness to God and saying, "God, look at how faithful I am--you should keep me on the team, because I'm so committed!"  And that same part of us struggles to admit there could be times we get pointed in the wrong direction and need God to pull us back. 

But when we start from a place of knowing that we're beloved of God and don't have to "wow" God, impress God, or earn a spot on God's "nice list", then we can be open about our need.  We don't have to pretend we are self-sufficient or that we have all the answers.  We don't have to try and "sell ourselves" to persuade God about why we should be kept on the team.   And instead we can simply ask for the help that will keep us centered on God.  "Let your hand rest on me, so that I won't go astray anymore.  Don't let me out of your presence, so that I won't get lost.  Hold on to me, so that I won't turn away anymore."  It's not a statement of my promise to God: it's a prayer for help from God.

We need that reminder, especially in this season.  It is so easy for the celebration of Christmas to become about us thinking we need to show how competent and put together we are, when the coming of Jesus is really about God's embrace of humanity despite all the ways we don't have it all put together.  Our managing of extra tasks: putting up the decorations, making the cookies, getting the house to smell like cinnamon and gingerbread for the whole month of December, the buying of presents, the busy schedule of additional activities--it can all feel like we do these things to show to the world (or to God or to ourselves?) just how much "stuff" we can get accomplished.  And it's easy to get that all entangled with our relationship with God--to think that Christmas is about our need to do something for Jesus.  That's "Little Drummer Boy" logic right there, isn't it?  That when the Christ-child is born, we have to scramble and find some gift to bring, some talent to show off, or some skill to impress the Savior with.  (Honestly, who thinks that the mother of a newborn baby needs a drum solo just hours after giving birth?  This song seems to think that Jesus needs us to offer something or to prove our devotion, when maybe the incarnation is really about the God who comes to meet our needs, not the other way around.)

To pray these ancient words from the psalms is to have our perspective turned right-side-up again, so that we no longer see Jesus' coming as some kind of divine inspection or audition, but as God's entry into our midst to meet us at the place of our need.  We don't even need to convince God that we're a worthwhile investment because we are so devoted on our own--we can pray with the psalmist here, "I want to stay pointed toward you, but I know I'll go astray on my own, so keep your hand on me and keep me close."  That's the way sheep in a flock see themselves in relationship to their Shepherd (which, you might remember, is how the psalm began, calling on God as Shepherd).  Sheep don't have to persuade the shepherd to keep taking care of them; the Shepherd knows his job is to care for the sheep, not only in giving food and water to the ones who stay close, but in helping to keep the ones going astray to get back where they need to be.  The sheep don't have to pretend they will never get distracted or lost; they simply trust that the shepherd will keep them pointed in the right direction.  That's us, too: unpretentious sheep--as in, sheep that do not have to pretend, not at all. We know we are kept and held in the Shepherd's care.

If some part of us is still stuck thinking that we need to prove our devotion or worth to Jesus, here's a moment to get ourselves set straight.  We don't.  Our prayer never has to be, "Love me, God, and I'll be ever so faithful," but rather can always be honestly, "I need you to help me not get lost.  I'll trust that you will because I know I'm beloved.  And on the days I struggle even to believe that much, help me even to believe." The One for whom we are waiting is not holding try-outs for the team or a surprise inspection of the employees. The One for whom we wait and hope is already committed to keeping us from getting lost.  The coming of Jesus, then, isn't something to be afraid of, but to put our hope in.

Now, face the day with that in your awareness, and see how it changes everything.

Lord Jesus, keep your hand on us, so that we won't turn away from you anymore.